Talk:2015 Group Project 3: Difference between revisions
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Overall, the wiki page has covered the topic well. Contents are concise and easy to understand. It would be better if a ‘glossary’ can be added to explain some of the terminologies for readers. | Overall, the wiki page has covered the topic well. Contents are concise and easy to understand. It would be better if a ‘glossary’ can be added to explain some of the terminologies for readers. | ||
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First and foremost the PCOS Ovary Vs Non-PCOS Ovary hand drawn image is amazing and its placement at the beginning really drew in my attention to the topic. I also particularly liked the purple theme set up throughout the wikipage, I thought it really helped bring the page together.The headings, subheadings and images are all set out neatly making it very presentable and easy to follow. The language used was also very engaging which is always a plus. Content wise there seems to be sufficient information under most of the headings which really showed your efforts and elaborate research on the topic. The only portion that wasn’t particularly well present was the environmental factors. I felt like it needs the inclusion of some examples. | |||
To improve your page I would like to suggest the addition of a glossary that you could use to briefly define some terms such as ‘Hirsutism’ to allow a better understanding of the text. Additionally, I also noticed that under the ‘Hyperandrogenemia’ heading there was the use of the acronyms ‘GnRH’ and ‘LH’. Be sure to express the full term placing the acronym in brackets upon their first appearance before extensive use. I saw that this was done in the following paragraph where LH was initially correctly expressed as Luteinising Hormone but again this should be done at its very first appearance. The page also lacked some history surrounding the origin of the disease and how some of the treatments were established so that could also be included. | |||
Overall, the presentation of the page gave me the impression of a good understanding of the topic so well done guys! Keep up the good work. |
Revision as of 22:11, 13 October 2015
2015 Projects: Three Person Embryos | Ovarian Hyper-stimulation Syndrome | Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome | Male Infertility | Oncofertility | Preimplantation Genetic Diagnosis | Students
Links to Project Discussion Pages: Discussion 1 | Discussion 2 | Discussion 3 | Discussion 4 | Discussion 5 | Discussion 6
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--Mark Hill (talk) 11:19, 25 September 2015 (AEST) OK so this is far from ready for peer assessment. This is a very large topic with many possible sub-headings (missing from your project page) as well as animal models and environmental/genetic information. I cannot see any illustrations, images, media, resources added to the project page to illustrate the topic and give a balance to the content.
--Z3416054 (talk) 02:07, 27 September 2015 (AEST) Hey guys, where do you think we should include animal models? Also I think it'd be a pretty snazzy idea to have a cartoon/photograph of polycystic ovaries in the intro and then for causes/pathogenesis have a flow chart or something similar
Z3416054 (talk) 16:20, 27 September 2015 (AEST) Hey guys, I've found some pretty snazzy images of polycystic ovaries, but do you know if we have to find the copy right information to be able to use the images? Most of the images come from google-image linked sites and don't really give much information on usage
--Z3459224 (talk) 14:40, 29 September 2015 (AEST) Yeah I'm pretty sure we have to find the copy right information for all our images. I think it would be best if we try to find images on Pubmed first. If not we can use other journal databases.
--Z3416054 (talk) 16:51, 30 September 2015 (AEST) Agreed, I'll get rid of the one I put up as I couldn't really find any copyright information for it. I'll have another browse of pubmed and see what I can find
Z3416054 (talk) 17:35, 30 September 2015 (AEST) I uploaded a new image/flowchart with some proper referencing. I'm thinking that my discussion of pathogenesis will largely be on insulin resistance and hyperandrogenemia
--Z3459224 (talk) 12:24, 2 October 2015 (AEST) That sounds good! If you need any articles, let me know. I came across a few articles on pathogenesis.
--Z3416054 (talk) 14:03, 6 October 2015 (AEDT) Howdy guys! I added an image of some polycysts present on the polycystic ovaries of a rat. It's nothing too amazing, but if you think it's not necessary/appropriate for the section let me know and I can find another pic Sub-headings ]
Introduction- Krithika
Causes - Pathophysiology - Miller, Krithika - Risk Factors- Hyolie, Krithika
Diagnosis - Hyolie
Treatment - Niousha
Peer Asssessment
1
I'm a little confused as to what your actual topic is? Is it female infertility or polycystic ovarian syndrome? I think it is important to clarify that so as the reader of your page continues reading, they know the exact topic they are reading about. I also think that where you have written “definition” under the big picture of the PCOS ovaries, it should say “epidemiology” as that is more what it sounds like. I also think the picture should be below the information, that way we know a bit better what we’re looking at.
I love the little purple box of information under the “Definition” as it stands out and is pleasing to the eye. The purple boxes throughout the page are really great! The image next to it is also really good as it is clear and relates back to the information beside it. Great use of images! They are all relevant and placed well and the hand drawn image is done well. Your “pathogenesis” section is great as are your sections “diagnosis” and “prevention and treatment”. Detailed and easy to read. It was great to see scientific and animal models throughout the page. Perhaps it would be good to include a little more information linking directly to the literature for more advanced readers. I would also suggest adding a glossary to the bottom of your page, as for people with little to no scientific background who may read this, they may not understand all the words and terms.
It appears under the subheading “environmental factors” that there is no referencing? However, aside from that you have an extensive references list and have referenced correctly and thoroughly throughout the page. I would also suggest adding a bit more information under the heading “causes” aside for the subheading “genetics” as the other sections look a bit bare. The layout is great, easy to read and follow however one suggestion may be to get rid of the underline below your subheadings. It just may make things look a little less clustered and final.
You seem to have covered all the key points pertaining to your topic, however, a section on complications of either PCOS or female infertility may be good to add. Your content and headings are good and references are cited properly. I would suggest perhaps relating it back a bit more to the basics of embryology and discuss what a pregnancy would be a life is a woman with PCOS did get pregnant. Overall, this is a really great page with a good layout that flows well. Keep up the good work!
2
This project page is nicely organized, and well balanced with graphs, tables, and diagrams. It is wise to narrow down the topic and focus on the female infertility caused by polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. But it will be better if the other possible causes are mentioned at the beginning.
The image ‘ PCOS Ovary vs. Non-PCOS Ovary’ explains the differences between normal and PCOS Ovary very well. It will be better if the image is inserted after the texts which define PCOS as it causes confusion about your topic at the current location.
The use of colour highlighting is very impressive. It do make the important messages stand out.
This Page has correct referencing. Current scientific researches are nicely summarized and fitted into the context. It is impressive to include animal and cell culture models in the pathogenesis section.
Overall, the wiki page has covered the topic well. Contents are concise and easy to understand. It would be better if a ‘glossary’ can be added to explain some of the terminologies for readers.
3
First and foremost the PCOS Ovary Vs Non-PCOS Ovary hand drawn image is amazing and its placement at the beginning really drew in my attention to the topic. I also particularly liked the purple theme set up throughout the wikipage, I thought it really helped bring the page together.The headings, subheadings and images are all set out neatly making it very presentable and easy to follow. The language used was also very engaging which is always a plus. Content wise there seems to be sufficient information under most of the headings which really showed your efforts and elaborate research on the topic. The only portion that wasn’t particularly well present was the environmental factors. I felt like it needs the inclusion of some examples.
To improve your page I would like to suggest the addition of a glossary that you could use to briefly define some terms such as ‘Hirsutism’ to allow a better understanding of the text. Additionally, I also noticed that under the ‘Hyperandrogenemia’ heading there was the use of the acronyms ‘GnRH’ and ‘LH’. Be sure to express the full term placing the acronym in brackets upon their first appearance before extensive use. I saw that this was done in the following paragraph where LH was initially correctly expressed as Luteinising Hormone but again this should be done at its very first appearance. The page also lacked some history surrounding the origin of the disease and how some of the treatments were established so that could also be included.
Overall, the presentation of the page gave me the impression of a good understanding of the topic so well done guys! Keep up the good work.