Talk:2017 Group Project 1
|Student Projects: 1 Cerebral Cortex | 2 Kidney | 3 Heart | 4 Eye | 5 Lung | 6 Cerebellum|
|Student Page - here is the sample page I demonstrated with in the first labs.I remind all students that you have your own Group Forum on Moodle for your discussions, it is only accessible by members of your group.|
I have now added a discussion Forum for your group to Moodle. You can add your discussion here (available to everyone) or in your Moodle Group Discussion (available to only your group members).
The collapsible table below shows the assessment criteria that will be used for this group project.
About the Discussion Page
This should be considered as the "other side" of the project page. It is an area where you can:
- Assemble resources.
- Add useful links.
- Discuss your project with team members. (Please do not use student names on any page on this Wiki)
- Paste your Peer Assessments. (Added anonymously, do not identify yourself)
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMHT0024757/ Z5177691 (talk) 22:37, 23 August 2017 (AEST)
Lobes and Function
Nature article: https://www.nature.com/nrn/journal/v9/n2/full/nrn2252.html Z5177691 (talk) 22:57, 23 August 2017 (AEST)
Anatomy and Function
-change from dot points
-finish function information
This page is very well structured and sequential. It provides a very detailed explanation of development under chronological subheadings. Subpages under images are well informed, but some images lack a proper Copyright phrase and Student Image Template to indicate reproducibility. On the main page, some subheadings need to be capitalised (formatting) and student signatures need to be provided on relevant sections, rather than student numbers . The "Anatomy of the Cerebral Cortex" section is filled with dot points, and could be improved using paragraphs, images and Wiki formatting. The layout of the Abnormalities section could be improved, by changing the headings and subheadings. The images and videos on the page are all very relevant to the topic, but I don't think the screenshots from youtube are appropriate of reputable. The page could benefit from a glossary list and 'Future Research' section. However, the reference list was well constructed. Overall the the page addresses the brief very well.
Be careful in how the sentences are expressed for example in the introduction ‘the cerebral cortex is actually the outermost layer’; avoid using ‘actually’ in this sentence. Don’t forget to remove the student numbers from the posts. Minor grammatical errors; no use of commas in long sentences. The images do include copyright however the team has forgotten to place the Student Image Template that is required. The team should add a small description of the images that are on their webpage so readers will see immediately what the image is showing. The team could do a further questions subheading or an animal model subheading to explore more on the research of the Cerebral Cortex.
Subheadings and content that have been used show a good understanding of the topic area. The use of dot points where necessary are done well which makes the project easier to understand and read through. The use of tables to demonstrate the ‘Timeline of Corticogenesis’ is done comprehensively; maybe an image for each day that is explained should be added to show consistency (as only the last row has an image). The team has used their own diagrams which shows that the team was innovative in displaying their research. The references used are cited correctly, however, there are links at the bottom where they need to fix up and place it under references.
Overall, the page is has nice structuring making it relatively easy to follow. But they are missing major topics necessary including historical discoveries, developmental signalling processes, current research and animal models. The introduction was short and concise, which provided a relevant amount of background knowledge. The anatomy and functions of the cerebral cortex could be put before the development so that it ties in with the introduction. The images and videos were relevant to the topic, which aided in understanding the content. However, labelling, adding a description and citing is necessary for images and videos which has not been done. A table would be a great feature for the timeline because right now its annoying to read and has a messy, unfinished look. References need fixing.
The page has good structure and formatting, however there is a significant unfinished touch. Anatomy of the Cerebral Cortex heading could place all the information in a table to make it easier to read as well as images to help the viewer visualise the process. Maybe remove the student numbers because they are unnecessary and make the page look not as professional. figures and tables need to be labelled as well as referencing and copyright claims. The diagram under the statement "Migration and division of all six layers of the cortex is completed during the third trimester. Each layer has distinct synaptic connections and cell types that contribute to the specific functions of the cortex." needs to be further explained because I had a hard time understanding the image and what each section meant. The video is a nice touch to help understand the function and placement of the cerebral cortex. Developmental abnormalities was well written, easy to understand and flowed nicely.
Well-structured and provides a vast amount of background information on the functions and structure of the cortex before delving into the details of development. However, the anatomy of the cerebral cortex and the layers are difficult to understand due to heavy use of dot points – perhaps images would be of good use in this section. There is consistently limited evidence of in-text references or citations throughout the information (rather than at the beginning of some of the sections) which makes it harder to link or follow where information was gathered. Headings are concise and easy to follow however the “other info to add” subheading under “Anatomy of the Cerebral Cortex” needs to be reworded for efficiency. Under the subheading “A) Disorders due to …” the disorders are inconsistently numbered – a 2 needs to be placed with “Hemimegalencephaly” as well as 8 with Schizencephaly. Functions of the cerebral cortex is hard to follow as dot points are used with lacking descriptions or expansion. Perhaps further discussing the actions of each functional area would provide more sufficient information in this part.
The layout is looking very good, pictures could be a little smaller. I like the choice of headings, they explain well what is going to be talked about. I feel like you need to add headings like animal models and current research needs to be fixed but I’m sure that’s what is intended. I have some minor points for some of the headings: Early development: Spelling: Rhomboncephalon, and the instead of three at the beginning of a paragraph. Overall this heading was covered well Development of cerebral cortex: With images, you can add figure titles and this could make your page flow better!! Maybe expand a bit more on the key developmental zones in the human cortex, a brief explanation of what happens could help. The table is very well explained, however for E50-55 I can’t see a reference for all the information, also for the picture in the table for E50-55, you haven’t copied the copyright information so you should add that so it can be used in the page and also add the student template. I really like the drawn picture, but again a figure description would be helpful. This section is very well done. Anatomy of the cerebral cortex Some great points but needs to be broken up into paragraphs. Your Wikipedia link for the image is a good image however you should find the original, I recognize it from Cajal’s drawings so I think it could be in a paper about the cerebellum with Cajal. You have good ideas for this heading, also maybe add another image. Functions of the cerebral cortex For functional areas, I think a 2 sentence description of each area would be good and maybe a picture for reference. Abnormalities Intext referencing would be better. For images, add the student template to each!! Im not entirely sure how I feel about the youtube screenshots as images, maybe use one but try and find some in research articles aswell. Overall, I think you’ve done a really good job at summarizing abnormalities.
The introduction was a good opening to the Cortex page as it gives a brief overview and understanding of the cortex generally. The next subheading, “Early development of the Brain”, provides of a simple and clear explanation of the early development process however images would be a great addition to help visualise the text. Try having a look at some images that were shown to us in previous lectures on the brain development where it showed the neural plate, neuroectoderm and subsequent developments. The next subheading, “Development of Cerebral Cortex”, would probably do better to be called “Later Development of Cerebral Cortex” as it would be a seamless flow from the previous subheading of “Early development…”. It was good that a labelled image was used and information was added for explanation. It helped orient me as I was going on to read about the timeline of corticogenesis. The timeline was detailed and the use of bold helped highlight key terms. However, I would suggest making another column for images on each day. Visual reinforcement just makes the information easier to absorb and make more sense. The subheading, “Anatomy of the Cerebral Cortex”, is clearly in the editing process. I would just once again definitely recommend the use of images in this section, both hand-drawn diagrams and labelled images from the internet. I thought the use of a video was a clever way to cover the cerebral cortex functions. A bit of general text that briefly covers the functions of the main parts would be a good addition in this section, as a segue into the video. The “Abnormalities” subheading was a good balance of text and images. It was easier to read because it was split into categories. I would only suggest that you mention at the beginning of the section that abnormalities associated with the cerebral cortex development can be divided into the following categories… I can see the references were placed at the beginning of the section and I’m assuming that is temporary. It is better if they are dispersed within the text where appropriate. There are a good bunch of references but you could probably aim for 25-30 for this page.
This page needs some more information about current research, signaling processes, future questions and references to animal models. It would also be good with a table or quick overview of developmental origin. There has been a good use of pictures and tables. The setup of the section about abnormalities is really good. This page needs to use more references during the sections and not only at the start of a section. A glossary list would also be good for the reader to understand the page.
- Introduction: Gives a quick knowledge of the cerebral cortex. A picture would be good to support this introduction and maybe a bit more description of the different terms. This section also needs references.
- Early Development: Good setup with bulleting. I find some of the context a bit confusing to read - especially these two sentences "From there three primary vesicles, there is a further division at the anterior extremity of the medullary canal into five secondary vesicles during week five" and "During the fifth week, the embryonic brain undergoes rapid growth folding the neural tube and consequently resulting in three brain flexures" Maybe you can rephrase this.
- Development of Cerebral Cortex: Good section! Good overview.
- Timeline of Corticogenesis: Please give a short introduction of what Corticogenesis and Neurogenesis means. Good picture supporting the E50-55, maybe you can put this picture already in the section called "Key developmental zones in the human cortex" since this is the first time we get introduced to the different zones and plates and it would give a better basic knowledge before getting into Corticogenesis.
- Anatomy and Function of the Cerebral Cortex: These two sections should maybe be earlier on the project page together with the introduction since it's a basic understanding of the Cerebral Cortex. Both sections look a bit messy, try to work on making it more simple and easier to read - it kind of looks like personal notes and not a proper information site :-) These sections also need some references. The video in this section gives a good understanding. Good idea putting a video on the page.
- Abnormalities associated with Cerebral Cortex Development: This section is really good. Great overview of the different scenarios and a lot of pictures to support the reading. Instead of mentioning all the references in the start of the section, you should add the specific reference used for each subsection, this will make it easier for the reader to look up references for specific sections.
In the introduction section, it was not referenced where the information facts are from. This section should introduce a brief information on the topic, what you are going to discuss on the whole wiki page, introduce current researches and animal models to support the new findings and understandings. Also, don't use "actually" in the sentence. On the page, It is better to write in full sentences instead of dot points as I've seen a lot of them and include any of scientific words in the glossary section at the end of the page. Where you've inserted picture, it will be clearer to also include it within the text in brackets for example (Figure 1). Any figures or pictures on this page needs references as well. In the abnormality section, it is well written with supporting pictures, but in my opinion, it is easier to read if the the figures/pictures are on the same side and texts on the other side instead of alternating. This section was very thoroughly referenced too. I think a small paragraph under the heading introducing the different type of disorders before going into greater details. Don't focus too much on the anatomy as I can see this section is not finished nor written in paragraph and no pictures or figures, would be better to swap anatomy with some other embryology discussion for example, signalling processes. Touch on current researches, animal model if any and future questions as they were not seen on the page. Also include a glossary table. References section is looking good but more is needed.
Overall, a really informative and well-written wiki. The information was well presented and was understandable. The abnormalities section of the wiki, was particularly well done, as it was a good idea to group each abnormality with the disruption of the main event that lead to the abnormality, as it informs the reader that different abnormalities arise from a disruption of different processes that occur in the development of the cerebral cortex. The diagrams and pictures were useful as it functions as a reference point.
Overall, the layout was good, however maybe use more of a dot-point layout in the Anatomy section and maybe add some diagrams of pictures to enhance the information given. Also the sub-title "what is it?" is probably not needed as the introduction itself suggests that you will be describing what the cerebral cortex is and what is does. The Functions of Cerebral cortex may also need a bit more text as the video should just be a supplement rather than the main source for information in that section. Overall, well done as it was an informative and well written wiki.
Overall I find the information provided to be concise and easy to understand. The introduction was great in giving us a brief overview of page. The layout of the early development of the brain and the development of the cerebral cortex was really nice. I like the use of bullet points as this makes it easier to read. Also good amount of referencing is seen in this area. The use of the table is also a nice touch to the page and I like the picture used for E50-55. However, it could help to have another column with pictures for each row. That would help with the understanding of the text. For the anatomy of the cerebral cortex, it seems a little messy and hard to read as it is too point form. Perhaps these could be phrased into proper sentences with certain parts placed into bullet points to make it easier to read. Also, with the anatomy, pictures would be very helpful to aid in the explanation. For the functions of the cerebral cortex, it lists the functional areas but not the functions of those areas. Although it is stated in the video, which is a nice addition to the page, this could be improved by adding short sentences that state these functions that were mentioned as well. For Sections 1.4 and 1.5, references are also needed to state where the information was obtained from. The abnormalities section provides detailed explanations of the various disorders associated with the development of the cerebral cortex. There is also a good amount of pictures used. One thing I noticed was the references which was placed on the top of the section instead of throughout the text.
Overall, the page has a good structure and flow with good headings and subheadings. The information provided was concise and easy to comprehend. The introduction provides a brief overview and sufficient background knowledge about the cerebral cortex. I like how the team thought of mentioning about the early development of the brain before narrowing it down to the cerebral cortex. However these two sections do not seem to flow well. Maybe you could have 2-3 sentences that could help ease into the development of the cerebral cortex. I really love the timeline of corticogenesis. This part has been done really well. One minor improvement that could be made is to add images under each embryonic stage instead of just the last stage to better aid the reader into understanding the development. Also, a brief description of what corticogenesis is could be included before the table. For these two sections, there were a good amount of references.
For the anatomy of the cerebral cortex, it seems a little messy and hard to understand as its written in point forms. Perhaps, the dot points could be changed to proper sentences with histological images to tie it together. For the functions of the cerebral cortex, I think you could use a table to list down the areas and then provide a brief description of the functions of that particular part. The video is a good addition to the page. These two sections are lacking citations and references.The abnormalities section was well done. However, the citations should be added within the text instead of at the top of the page. Since there are a lot of abnormalities, maybe the team could list in a few sentences about all the abnormalities that they are going to discuss to have a better start to the section. For the images that are used on this page, the images should be labelled as “figure 1” or “table 1”. Maybe, sections on the “animal models” and “current research” could be added to wrap the page up.
Overall the project was very good and clear. Pictures were well placed and bullet points spaced out information, making the page easy to look at and follow. The layout of the beginning and end sections with the short paragraphs and interspersed bullet points broke up the information and highlighted key facts. The introduction was a good overview of the page, including a quick summary of the anatomy, function, and development of the cerebral cortex.
There were some basic grammatical and spelling errors (e.g. “neurons” is spelled wrong under the subheading “Layer 4”), but for the most part did not take away from the clarity of the page. One sentence, “From there three primary vesicles, there is a further division at the anterior extremity of the medullary canal into five secondary vesicles during week five,” seems to be missing something at the beginning that would increase clarity.
Some pictures had a lot of information in the summary when clicking on them while others lacked sufficient information. Some pictures that could benefit from more information are Corticogenesis of mouse and humans.jpeg, SBH.png, Disorders of Cortical Formation2.png, Symptoms of microcephaly.png, Hemimegalencephaly.png, and SchizencephalicBrain.jpg. These pictures are relevant to the topic and are pretty self-explanatory so this does not take away much clarity from the page but for the parameters of the project, additional summary should be added. The picture Stage22 HPA2L.jpg has good information in the summary but it is oddly structured. FASface.jpeg does not have any copyright information included. Having Gray754.png displayed on the page rather than as a link would look better.
The video describing the functions of the cerebral cortex was a good introduction to that topic. The video was easy to watch and understand. The first video about corpus callosum agenesis was a good introduction to the topic, but the second video about corpus callosum agenesis was long and the lecturer was hard to understand. That subheading would benefit from a brief description of that topic rather that a long video explanation.
The switch from a mix of bullets and short paragraphs to all bullet points in Anatomy of the Cerebral Cortex makes the page look less cohesive. The last bullet point in Layer 4 is hard to understand and the last 2 bullet points in Layer 5 would flow better if they were combined. The information in these sections are good and relatively easy to follow.
Overall the project is very good. The table explaining the timetable of cortex development is a clear way to break down the topic. Breaking down the information of abnormal development into what went wrong in the embryology (e.g. migration problems vs. differentiation problems) highlights importance of embryology in congenital disorders. There is a lot of information about the abnormal development of the cortex but could use some information about past and current research and animal studies. Reference list at the end looks good but the in-text citations of abnormal development should be interspersed with the information rather than all at the beginning.
- Overall, the page is well structured and relatively easy to follow with the headings and subheadings relevant to the topic area (embryology of the cerebral cortex).
- The introduction was short and concise, which provided a relevant amount of background knowledge before delving straight into the development.
- Perhaps the Anatomy and Functions of the cerebral cortex could be put before the development so that it ties in with the introduction.
- The use of dot points under Anatomy and Function of the Cerebral Cortex was excessive and gives off an unfinished feel. Perhaps you could add in a couple of images to make these dot points easier to understand. Also, it might be better to use the * function to create these dot points.
- The use of the table on the "Timeline of Corticogenesis” was quite clever and made it easier to understand, however I suggest that you add photos in E30, E31-32 and E40-45 since there seems to only be one photo in E50-55. The page is lacking a "further questions" section which would be quite informative in understanding the research gap to date.
- I think the Disorders was nicely done and was very informative. The use of images in the left and right side of the page made it aesthetically pleasing to read. However this section lacks references, which I think you should add to avoid plagiarism.
- The images and videos that are on the page are very relevant to the topic, which aided in understanding the content. However perhaps you could label them using "Figure 1", or "Table 1" etc as well as putting an appropriate description under the image/video. Also, the link of an wiki image under Layers was not inserted properly, so be sure to check that for next time.
- References were inconsistent throughout the page, however most were done properly.
The chosen headings for the development of the cerebral cortex were very suitable to highlight the key topics in providing a page of summarised information. It was then easy to navigate through the page using the shortcuts and finding information. Although, there was one sub sub heading “Timeline of Corticogenesis” that was formatted to be in bold while the rest were not.
The disorders listed seems to be really interesting and it covers the whole spectrum of the case abnormalities. But I suggest to get rid of the letter bullets (e.g. A), B), C) ) for the breakdown of the abnormalities.
The introduction had a quick and concise text, however, an image of the cerebellum would be suitable in this section on the side. While the sub sub heading stated that the introduction section will talk about the features of a cerebellum, a paragraph about the development and its stages were written down in this section as well. This could be moved into the ‘Early Development of the Brain’ subheading underneath. Bullet points of the brain layers as well as a diagram would be helpful for the visualisation of the brain.
For the sections that explain the development in specific weeks, a table would be advisable to make it neater and easier to look at. Also, an image was left inside the table grids and it was confusing whether it was meant to be there or not. Perhaps adding a photo gallery showing the stages at the bottom of the table would be better.
Hand drawn diagrams were really precise, neat and was very visually appealing. It was taking up all the space and unless it is intentional, I suggest to resize the drawing into a smaller one that fits the page as well as the accompanying text and content of the drawing.
The variety of visual aids were really entertaining and were referenced properly.
Finally, the reference list at the bottom of the page did not have a consistent format. It was mostly APA format however the others looked like a different format.
The most obvious flaw was the lack of polish in formatting of some of the page. Bullet points are only so useful when it comes to writing a wiki page, instead of taking notes. The page is unfinished, but, the content included especially in the "Development of Cerebral Cortex" and "Abnormalities associated with Cerebral Cortex Development" was extensive and well done. The large table that linked the development with the time period was very useful and the choice of bolding key words allowed the main idea in the paragraph to be quickly understood from a glance. The use of images very much enhanced the descriptions and checker-like the layout of the different abnormalities was refreshing. Some subheadings, such as the Anatomy and Function of the cerebral cortex, could be elaborated on but the overall structure of the page is logical and fluid, and the writing is clear and concise without being superficial.
• The page has an excellent structure covering a broad variety of topics regarding the cerebral cortex. It was great to see how you also explored abnormalities associated with the cerebral cortex. Furthermore the use of various subheadings and headings related to cerebral cortex development meets criteria 1 and 2 of the assessment.
• The presentation of the wiki page was excellent in that a variety of images, videos and tables were utilized. The use of such sources of information helps present information in a much more clear and concise manner, whilst also providing a thorough explanation to visual learners. Hence the wiki page has an element of teaching at a peer level (criteria 4 is satisfied).
• A large number of references have also been included within the wiki page, a characteristic which helps increase the reliability of information presented. Furthermore, most sources are recent which another great characteristic. Thus, it appears that the group has satisfied criteria 3 for the assessment.
• Each topic appears to show a significant amount of detail which is excellent. In addition, the use of images alongside the text is a great tool as the audience is able to better visualize the concept being described.
Areas of improvement:
• Although you have provided a variety of recent references, to improve you may avoid using sources as old as 1977 as results presented from this study may be outdated.
• It was excellent that the functional areas of the brain were listed, however to improve you may wish to elaborate on the specific functions of these areas. You may also explore how abnormalities of these areas during development may impact upon the behaviour of the individual following birth
• Whilst a variety of topics have been covered, you may wish to also describe the importance of signaling throughout the process of cortical development. For example, you may investigate different growth factors and receptors involved in the process.
• Another possible improvement would be to perhaps include a timeline of different researchers who contributed to the in-depth understanding of the developing cortex that we have today. You may also describe what each researcher discovered.
• In order to completely satisfy criteria 5, you may wish to conduct further research beyond the scope of formal teaching activities. For example you may explore the contribution of animal models towards our understanding of cortical development.
This peer review is based on the relevant dot points of the ‘Group Assessment Criteria’, as well as subheadings suggested by Mark. This information can be found on the student page.
|1. The choice of content shows a good understanding of the topic area||The developmental origin of the cerebral cortex is addressed well under the sub-heading ‘Early development of the brain’.
Abnormal development of the cerebral cortex and the associated conditions are covered in an immense amount of detail. The accompanying images and videos enhance the written information, as well as making it easier for the reader to comprehend. In addition, the sub-headings of this section compartmentalize the congenital diseases in a logical manner that highlights the link between abnormal development and specific diseases.
|There are several key topic areas missing from the page:
Some sections that have been included are somewhat irrelevant to the subject matter. For example, there is a large (unfinished) section on the anatomy and functions of the cerebral cortex. While it is important to provide a bit of an anatomical background on the subject, it shouldn’t be a major focus of this assignment. Focus more on the sections mentioned above, and keep the project focused on the embryology of the cerebral cortex.
|2. Content is correctly cited and referenced||There have been attempts at referencing throughout the assignment. A reference list has been produced and appears mostly correct. References have not been repeated throughout the list.
Peer-reviewed primary research articles have been used in this assignment.
The student-drawn image has been cited correctly, as have most of the images used in the ‘abnormal development’ section.
|Overall, referencing in this assignment is very poor. Most of the content is completely devoid of any references (see ‘introduction’, ‘anatomy of the cortex’ and ‘abnormal development), and sections that have been referenced have been referenced “by paragraph” (see ‘timeline of corticogenesis’)
Many of the images have been cited incorrectly and used without permission. Remember to include the full reference, the original summary and the copyright license information for each image.
|3. The wiki has an element of teaching at a peer level||The information presented is mostly at a level appropriate for peers. Images and hand-drawn diagrams have been included to facilitate the readers understanding of the subject matter. Some of the images contain useful descriptions of the subject matter, and aid in understanding of the topic.||Many of the acronyms and terms used in this assignment are not well explained. Include a glossary of terms to make some of the content easier to follow and understand.|
|4. Relates the topic and content of the Wiki entry to learning aims of embryology||The development of the cerebral cortex was covered extensively, which is a very important learning aim of embryology.||There are certain learning aims of embryology that have not been included in this assignment, such as developmental signaling processes (see criteria 1 for more information). There has been no discussion of relevant historical or current research (adding in the subheadings “key developments” and “current research” would help rectify this).|
|5. The content of the wiki should demonstrate to the reader that your group has researched adequately on this topic||Certain aspects have been researched and presented well (such as embryological development).
Links to other pages of the UNSW embryology wiki have been included, however they have been used as references rather than just links.
|Information from the UNSW embryology wiki has been used as direct sources of information. Instead they should be included to relate this particular wiki page to other areas of learning.
The small number of sources cited in the reference list demonstrates a poor and narrow approach to researching this topic. A greater library of sources should be used to create this page (mainly primary research articles).
General Comment: While some aspects of the wiki page have been done well, the page is largely unfinished. Many sections still need to be added, and others are in need of improvement.
The introduction of this page gives a good general background but could benefit from adding bullet points to describe the six horizontal layers of the cortex and maybe a short summary of its clinical significance. 'Early Development' was well written, easy to follow and well referenced. 'Development of Cerebral Cortex' would benefit from a short introductory statement instead of going straight into the 'Main classes of neurons'. Pictures and tables in this section were informative and engaging to the reader. Hand-drawn picture was well done, colourful and easy to interpret. 'Anatomy of the Cerebral Cortex' looks unfinished and isn't easy to read as it doesn't flow or show a clear structure. No references can be seen and no pictures or tables to make for easier reading or understanding. The different layers of the cortex would greatly benefit from a table with structure/function format or a clear diagram. The same is true for 'Functions of the Cerebral Cortex'. 'Abnormalities associated with Cerebral Cortex Development' I liked the setup of this section because of its clear headings and subheadings as well as its informative pictures. The captions on some of these pictures need to be elaborated on. Also couldn't see any in text referencing which really needs to be present. Content is clear and concise and easy to follow. This section was engaging and well done. 'INFO/Research Links' was not finished yet but shows lots of research articles that could be promising.
Peer review project 1:
I have some general comments which applies to almost all of the sections in the project:
- The referencing is not proper. A lot of the sections do not have reference or all of the reference are at the bottom of the section.
- Some of the sections have bullet points instead of text. It feels like you are reading somebodies notes not a project.
- It would be nice with more pictures to get a better understanding. The pictures there are good, but it does not have any caption. The size is to big as well for some of the pictures (the drawing with the mouse and human model)
- The project does not have a current research, future questions section or animal, which is a requirement for the project.
- I think it would be better for the project if the anatomy and function sections stood before the development part. It would give a better understanding or at least I think so.
- In general, I don’t feel like the project is connected, and expressions like cortigenesis and neurogenesis is not defined.
- I really think the timeline is nice. But a lot of the text within the timeline would have been more appropriate to write in the cortex development section. It should contain some key discoveries instead. But the text there is good, makes sense to me and is well written.
- In the early development of the brain section I don’t understand some of the sentence like: “From there three primary vesicles, there is a further division at the anterior extremity of the medullary canal into five secondary vesicles during week five. These are fundamental divisions of the adult brain and communicate freely with each other”. Some of it should properly be rephrased.
- There are some repetions during the project. The text could be compromised.
- In general, the language is neutral and written in a good scientific way.
- Covers only development, anatomy, functions and abnormalities, more subheadings could be better and exploring other areas of the embryology of the cerebral cortex
- Nice introduction that summarises what the cerebral cortex does and some of its structural layers. Would be nice to see a diagram with the layers of the cerebral cortex or a diagram of the cerebral cortex in the introduction.
- Development of the brain was covered really well and was detailed and also proper and good amount of referencing in this section. Good use of lot of pictures in this section, which made it much easier to understand.
- Timeline of corticogenesis was explained very well in a straightforward manner and use of the table helped.
- Anatomy of cerebral cortex as well as functions of the cerebral cortex is still incomplete and is mainly in dot points and no referencing
- Abnormalities was done well and very detailed and covered many types of abnormalities. Disorders were also divided into categories which is good.
- Good use of pictures in the abnormalities of the section for each abnormalities but use of videos were probably not necessary in this section
- Overall, introduction, development and abnormalities were all done well and good grammar and spelling. Other main headings definitely needed more work and referencing was done incorrectly or absent in some parts. There could be more subheadings and there is no glossary.
- References are from proper journal articles/peer reviewed journals which is good.
- Introduction provides a good summary, however the list of layers is quite long so maybe adding a diagram would make all that information a bit easier to take in? Or perhaps, listing the layers in dot point form rather than a long sentence. - Early development of the brain is very detailed, well researched as evidenced by the many references. Perhaps a short table summarising all that information could be added. Some formatting issues, but nothing that can't be easily fixed. - Development of cerebral cortex section very well done. Good use of diagrams and the table; they made the information easier to understand. However maybe the drawn diagram could be smaller (good job though!). Easy to follow. - Anatomy and functions sections are obviously unfinished, but it is clear that extensive research has been done to produce all that in the first place. So good job, once it is all formatted, I'm sure it will look great. All the dot points were easy to understand anyway. - Abnormalities section was very well researched. Great use of diagrams. Personally, I found the subheadings easy to grasp in the Contents, however it was a bit overwhelming to scroll through it all.
Overall, a good job. It is clear that some sections are incomplete, but it seems like there is a clear direction of where it is going. I would recommend a glossary of terms, just because the cerebral cortex is so complex and all the terms can become overwhelming. Tables in the development would help with this also just to provide a quick and easily accesible summary of development.
- Could have been linked together with anatomy and function for better structuring of page
- Simple diagram could have been used to provide context on body location
- Development of the cerebral cortex
- Section should be expanded upon to give context to the content
- Seemed like a sudden introduction of neuronal classes and key developmental zones without much expansion
- Section seemed to be more about components of the developing cerebral cortex rather than development itself – could update subheading to reflect this or update content to focus more on development
- Section should be expanded upon to give context to the content
- Timeline of corticogenesis
- Could have been its own subheading
- Should be moved up towards start of the page with introduction
- Should be moved up towards start of page with introduction
- Functional areas should be expanded upon to briefly discuss their different roles
- Should not rely too much on linked video
- Diagram “disorders of cortical formation” gave little information relating to section – seemed like illustration related little to the mentioned stages. Instead, could have mentioned that abnormalities arise during proliferation, migration and organisation during cortical development
- Lettering and numbering of subheadings in this section should be switched for clarity
- Overall was well done. However:
- Some diagrams lacked descriptions and figure legends/abbreviation definitions – diagrams should be self-explanatory and be understandable in combination with their descriptions, when taken out of their contexts within the page
- Minor grammatical errors present throughout the page
- Mostly well-structured but some subheadings can be shifted around - see above for specific feedback
- Remember to clear zIDs before final submission
- References are missing.
- Labeled images could be included to illustrate the relative position of cerebral cortex and cerebrum in the human brain and the organization of cerebral cortex into the six horizontal layers.
- Early development of the brain
- Written expression could be clearer. For example, L1: “The brain begins to develop during the third week (of pregnancy) when the neural plate and (neural) tube (are derived) from the outermost layer of embryonic cells, (that is) the neuroectoderm.”.
- A table listing the major development occurring at each week (i.e. week 3 – start of development of brain, week 4 – fusion of the neural folds) could be included for easier understanding of the developmental timeline
- Labeled images should be included for clear illustration of the relative positions and development of various parts of the cerebral cortex.
- Development of cerebral cortex
- Appropriate inclusion of images that aid in understanding the content. However, there is little reference or explanation to the images in the text. No caption is included for the images. The first image and the second image are redundant to each other as they are both illustrating the key developmental zones in the human cortex. Author may want to consider taking one of them out.
- Good use of a table in summarising the developmental timeline for corticogenesis. Clear explanation of corticogenesis.
- Anatomy of the cerebral cortex
- Content could be better organized in paragraphs instead of point forms.
- Labelled images should be included for clear illustration
- Functions of the cerebral cortex
- More content could be added to each of the functional areas listed.
- Video is appropriate and useful in facilitating understanding.
- Abnormalities associated with cerebral cortex development
- References should be included where appropriate instead of generalizing as “references used to write”.
- The amount of content seems slightly overwhelming as compared to other sections of the page which are equally important as well. Nonetheless, good effort in explaining the abnormalities in great details.
- Some references are missing.
- Good effort in for having both journal and book references. However, it would be good to adhere to either APA or BJP style of referencing.
Early Development of the Brain: Well written, maybe a little concise, there are some great images which could be useful for this section also Development of Cerebral Cortex: Lots of good information, maybe try to make this section a bit more fluid - comes of a little disjointed Anatomy of the Cerebral Cortex/Functions of the Cerebral Cortex: This section does not read well to the eye - that's not to say it is incorrect - I would try putting this into a friendly format Abnormalities associated with Cerebral Cortex Development: This section is huge, but each condition has a fairly concise explanation so well done
Overall: There is lots of sound information on the page - main emphasis would be giving the page a clean up of the format and trying to make the sections flow together a little nicer