Difference between revisions of "Talk:2017 Group Project 2"
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This page presents nicely and very easy to read. In the introduction section, instead of
This page presents nicely and very easy to read. In the introduction section, instead of those , put them in so they can be put automatically into the references. They have introduced good and enough information on the anatomy of the kidney. It was not fully referenced in the kidney development section but it was well written in this section with informative pictures and figures. It could be easier to direct the text to its picture accordingly. Nice and shot subheadings. In the abnormalities , brief paragraphs with well-referenced starting off nicely. Pictures and texts are presented and are easy to see without a mess. In the current research section, majority is a list of article links which I assume they are not yet touched on at this state, which is ok. But make sure to have 2-3 journal articles in this section. A few of future question along the way if you have any would be great. Overall, it is a nice written page, looking forward to see this as a whole!
Revision as of 21:41, 10 October 2017
|Student Projects: 1 Cerebral Cortex | 2 Kidney | 3 Heart | 4 Eye | 5 Lung | 6 Cerebellum|
|Student Page - here is the sample page I demonstrated with in the first labs.I remind all students that you have your own Group Forum on Moodle for your discussions, it is only accessible by members of your group.|
I have now added a discussion Forum for your group to Moodle. You can add your discussion here (available to everyone) or in your Moodle Group Discussion (available to only your group members).
The collapsible table below shows the assessment criteria that will be used for this group project.
About the Discussion Page
This should be considered as the "other side" of the project page. It is an area where you can:
- Assemble resources.
- Add useful links.
- Discuss your project with team members. (Please do not use student names on any page on this Wiki)
- Paste your Peer Assessments. (Added anonymously, do not identify yourself)
BMC Dev Biol Search: Renal Development
Cynthia here, I don't want to do the brain lol. I don't mind anything else though
This page is very informative and easy to read. I like the way it begins with the anatomy of the kidney in the developed human, and then progresses through its embryological development. The inclusion of developmental timeline table aids the flow of the page. Images are well integrated into the page with informative descriptions, however are not correctly referenced and do include the suitable Copyright statement. The page references well, but many sections are still unfinished. The page would benefit from a glossary at the end, and the "general info on the renal system" section should be included higher up on the page, or integrated into one of the other sections such as under the "kidney" heading. This page is very easy to read, but still needs some work.
References should be cited correctly, i.e. don’t leave the links in the paragraphs and use proper citation. The images used should include references, copyright statements as well as the Student Image template required. If there are copyright images the team could be innovative and use their own diagrams to display structures. Use references for the ‘Timeline of Kidney Embryology’ to show that a variety of sources were used to complete the table. Current Research and Future Questions subheading is incomplete. Glossary of terms could be used to explain certain words, for example explaining in simple terms what GDNF and RET are.
Subheadings and content that have been used show a good understanding of the topic area. The team has bolded important words in relation to the kidney structure. The team has also placed a description under the images which allows readers to understand what the image is showing. The use of a table of ‘Timeline of Kidney’ allows readers to understand the content of the wikipage easily (maybe add images to the table). The team has shown comprehensive research; however, they need to show more referencing of sources to display the research that they have done.
Overall this seems like a very well put together project and is very informative and easy to follow, and enjoyable to read. There is an appropriate balance of both text and visual diagrams, which greatly helped my understanding of the development of the kidneys. Figure 4 appears to be missing a reference. I do think perhaps an animation to explain nephron development may add additional clarity, and would provide another level of interaction for the reader. Perhaps also think about adding a student drawn diagram. The table is a great way to display the developmental stages in an easy to read manner. The ‘blood supply’ section appears to be copy and paste which I assume will be rewritten? The section on current research is simply a list of PubMed links, and should be expanded to display content that is informative to the reader. Likewise, ‘questions for the future’ and ‘general info on the renal system’ remain as headings without any accompanying information. I think the questions for the future could be an interesting section, however general info I would think will have been covered elsewhere in the project. The topic has clearly been researched well, and is well referenced, with most references being from scientific papers. All in all I think this is a high quality project, that will only require a few additional tweaks to take it to the next level.
The page flows very well and is easy to read. However, there is incorrect citing or no citing at all for images and texts which can trigger copyright issues, in some sections (mostly the beginning) of the page. The structure and anatomical position is extremely easy to read and comprehend, as well as the use of a table for development. Id advise to insert more images for development and the remaining sections to help the reader visualise the process instead of being overwhelmed by the information. Developmental abnormalities seem to contain information not necessarily needed. Maybe add the 5 paragraphs above "Kidney developmental abnormalities are diverse and they correspond to defects at different stages of kidney development" statement in a separate research topic. Good use of images for abnormalities though. Overall, the page is quite informative and has been researched effectively. It could be improved by slight tweaks in format aforementioned and correct referencing.
I found the introduction to the kidney didn't flow very nicely and each sentence and paragraph were just points added in. Also, the grammar and punctuation in the introduction paragraph needs to be edited. The final thing that needs to be altered in the introduction paragraph is the links that have just been placed in. I'm not sure if they are the references but if so they need to be referenced correctly. The anatomical position and kidney structure are written really well! The only improvement I could make is with figure one and two reference them within the writing e.g. "Their inner structure can be divided into 2 main areas: the outer cortex, and the inner medulla, as illustrated in Figure 2", otherwise this section is really great. The timeline of the kidney embryology is good - basic outline which makes it easy to follow such a complex process. To make the page flow in a more succinct manner I think it would be good to put the kidney timeline under the kidney development heading instead of separating the two as the kidney development information expands on the timeline really well. The kidney development information is really good, and I think the images really complete it. However, the link at the end of nephrogenesis needs to be referenced correctly with intext. Also under blood supply, it says "THIS IS COPY AND PASTE" so I'm not sure if that's copied off another page or your own notes but that needs to be fixed. The abnormality section was really good and current research is a really interesting thing to include, that section just needs some more information which I'm sure you guys are already on top of! Overall its a really great page, good effort.
I believe the headings chosen cover a sufficient amount of points you need in order to describe kidney development! Referencing needs to be changed, its easy to use the code on the wiki cheat sheet and that automatically makes a reference for you! When describing position, explain what retroperitoneal means, its not commonly known and also Thoracic 12 (T12) so people know what T12 refers too. For images, you need to find the copyright information and reference them properly, Mark has step by step instructions on what needs to be included in the image description. There aren’t many references in the first section of the page, it would benefit if you included some. Under nephrogenesis, point 3, you can find the articles pubmed ID and add the reference in that way instead of manually doing it. For developmental abnormalities, I feel like this could be explained better, it gets technical straight away and this can become quite confusing. Current research and questions need to be worked on but I’m sure that’s whats intended. Overall I think the content on this page is very relevant to kidney development and it was interesting to read. The two major things you should fix are image copyright and references and intext referencing.
The introduction was a clear overview of the kidney, its main parts and its role. The connection to embryological development is great because it ties in with the rest of the page. The only note here is that the references need to be properly referenced, not just pasted with the link. The anatomical position and kidney structure parts were good because there wasn’t too much text and it only served to complement the diagrams. This is a good section to put before kidney embryology as we can understand what is developing as the embryo grows. The timeline of kidney embryology was very brief. This is not bad considering you go into kidney development in more detail in the next section. However, I think another column for images would be worthwhile for the reader to visualise each stage or week of development. Again, there are a few referencing errors that I’m sure you’ll rectify soon. There is a good use of references in nephron development. You’ve also clearly noted the copy and paste of the blood supply section. For this part, I would strongly recommend some diagrams because vasculature can be quite complicated to understand with just text. The subheading, “Developmental abnormalities”, had a good chunk of research at the beginning that gave an overview of types of abnormalities before exploring three in detail. There was also a good amount of referencing. Clearly, the current research subheading is underdeveloped but there seems to be many articles that you will explore. The reference list will be more reflective of your research once you fix some of those referencing errors.
Good project page that goes through almost everything required for the page – the Current Research and Future questions section is lacking context though. The project is well written and easy to understand. Some sections have a better layout than others, so maybe you can work on making the same layout for the whole page. Some sections also have the wrong formatting of references, but other sections have perfect formatting. You must be careful with copy-pasting (Blood supply section) text into your project page without giving a reference from where you copy pasted the text from. Some of the pictures on the page also need more information on the image page itself like copyright information. It is good that you have added figure number to your pictures and a little description of it – this helps the reader to understand the context.
- The introduction to the Kidney is a really good, informative section. You need to change the format of your references in this section though. The layout might be a little bit confusing since there is a title “Kidney Structure” is in the middle of the page due to the pictures on each site.
- Nephron development and The developmental Abnormalities: These sections have a different layout compared to the earlier sections. It’s a lot of text, so try to make it look a bit more comfortable for the reader to go through. Maybe you can try to make the layout similar to some of the other sections and give the page a better flow.
--- This page presents nicely and very easy to read. In the introduction section, instead of pasting those references, put them in pubmed reference properly so they can be put automatically into the references. They have introduced good and enough information on the anatomy of the kidney. It was not fully referenced in the kidney development section but it was well written in this section with informative pictures and figures. It could be easier to direct the text to its picture accordingly. The timeline would be more beneficial if pictures were included. Nice and shot subheadings. In the abnormalities section, brief paragraphs with well-referenced starting off nicely. Pictures and texts are presented fairly good and are easy to see without a mess, but some of the terms were hard to understand e.g."when the left and right kidneys fuse at their lower poles by a parenchymal isthmus located ventral to the abdominal aorta, forming a "U" shape", maybe have a glossary section at the end of the page. A lot of references in this section is a bonus indicating it was researched well. In the current research section, majority is a list of article links which I assume they are not yet touched on at this state, which is ok. But make sure to have 2-3 journal articles in this section. A few of future question along the way if you have any would be great. Overall, it is a nice written page, looking forward to see this as a whole!